Lyrics
Colin Newman
A-Z
I've Waited Ages
I feel so wholesome I could cry
I got a chicken in my bandolier
I've hung it up to see if it would fall out
I've waited ages, but now I'm told
These things take time
Him work here all day
Him got his tonsils sprayed
Him got no time for utensils
Or words to that effect I'm deliberately diverging
Not the same but different you see
I've hung up to dry, my legs hanging out
Someone said to sew up the bottoms
But I can't reach, and a fall would break my nose
But still there's no harm in trying
& Jury
I was in no mood at all when the message was passed to me
Sprinting for the situation, I'd planned for no such emergency
And I'm not usually involved, so this was a chance to see
The workings that are more than machine, I understand
That you are the judges too
If I was somewhat involved, or even implicated
Denials always futile, they only complicate it
But for a moment I felt a need to be closer to the reasons
And what I saw I can't describe, I understand
That we are the judges too
Alone
[tabulated by cngrannell@yahoo.com]
G|--------------------|
D|--------------------|
A|-2----0-------------|
E|-----------3--------|
e|-0--------------|
B|-3---0-2-0-2-0--|
G|----------------|
D|----------------|
A|----------------|
E|----------------|
[Bm Am Gm]
Alone, with too much generosity
A theatre mask of hostility attracts
e|-12.----------|
B|-----12.------|
G|--------------|
D|--------------|
A|--------------|
E|--------------|
["." = harmonic]
G|--------------------|
D|--------------------|
A|---------------0----|
E|-2--------3---------|
[F#m Gm Am]
Assaults occur infrequently
And those who come, to conquer?
Need strength
But damage accumulates
Still
Moving him to tears
Retained a sense of humour
e|--------------------5--3--2--|
B|-0-2-3--2--3--2--3-----------|
G|-----------------------------|
D|-----------------------------|
A|-----------------------------|
E|-----------------------------|
e|----------------------|
B|----------------------|
G|-4----2----2-4-2-0----|
D|----------------------|
A|----------------------|
E|----------------------|
Order for Order
Beware its worth
It stops at nothing
Madame, Messieurs
Read it in book
Order in order
A combined attack
I found you out
Not big effect
Whistle tune
Becoming sprightly by degrees
Rescinded its glory
Found only manners
Order for order
A spanner in the works
Left to be seen
Long way to go
We have that problem
Solved by incompetence
Writer by nature
Always in armour
Image
I'll show you an image
You show me an image
What does your image mean?
You won't play my game
But you know that a sequence
Of events is unfolding
Who said that?
You haven't the right
I came complete and I'll leave that way
Life on Deck
[tabulated by cngrannell@yahoo.com]
G|---------------|
D|---------------|
A|-4--4--4-2-4-2-|
E|---------------|
G|-----------------------------|-----------------------------|
D|-----------------------------|-----------------------------|
A|-4--4--4-2-4-2---------------|-2--2--2-0-2-0---------------|
E|---------------4--4--4-2-4-2-|---------------2--2--2-0-2-0-|
e|-------------------------------|
B|-------------------------------|
G|-------------------------------|
D|-------------------------------|
A|-7~----7\6~----6\4~----4/6~----|
E|-------------------------------|
I'm living a life on deck with no hands to help me
It's getting rather fruity up here
And I rather fancy the sea is getting an upper hand
[E G# F# G#]
Not mind we jolly jack tars
I'm in disgrace
The cat sat on the carpet
I just lay here like a lump
You'll never guess, I had this dream
It wasn't very likely
They're not what they used to be
Troisieme
Rejoinder, rejoinder
Let's have no more of it
Below, it's below
I'm demeaned
I never dreamed this one
S-S-S-Star Eyes
S-s-s-star eyes
Seconds to Last
At a conference of one
I present my case
Freezing takes time, arson takes lives
The meeting adjourned to examine my biology
A home on a hilltop or a hole in the ground
My teeth were wired
I could hardly swallow
Now time seems suspended
My mouth was aching, my back was breaking
The tables turned, imagine!
My parts regrouped
I await this outcome
The grinding is stopped, the filing begins
I have to consider, I cannot decide
Some find disarray, some find misery
My fate decided, my attention divided
My seat reserved in a momentary diversion
Hung over in a cliff-hanger, yet still not losing grip
I seem excited, yet rarely satisfied
Inventory
[tabulated by qwerty@cmu.edu]
e|---------------------|
B|---------------------|
G|---------------------|
D|---------------------|
A|-------7---7-7-------|
E|-0-0-0---------0-----|
I'm testing the temperature, one foot in the water
A splash makes me gnash my teeth in horror
e|---------------|
B|-3h5---3h5-----|
G|---------------|
D|---------------|
A|---------------|
E|---------------|
(Like) inventory, I should be wary
My needs are slighter, I should be brighter
I'm listing some adjectives which fill me with horror
Those in bold type, like ripe, like snipe
[E D C]
I'm reading imaginary characters with motives
Which I should question, I should point out
e|------------------------|
B|------------------------|
G|------------------------|
D|-------------------7.---|
A|-------7--7-------------|
E|-0-0-0-------0--0-------|
["." = harmonic]
e|-17--15--14--------------------------|
B|-------------17----------------------|
G|-----------------17-17-17-17-16--16--|
D|-------------------------------------|
A|-------------------------------------|
E|-------------------------------------|
e|-17--15--14------------------------|
B|-------------17--------------------|
G|-----------------17-17-17-17-16----|
D|-----------------------------------|
A|-----------------------------------|
E|-----------------------------------|
e|-17--15--14--------------------------|
B|-------------17----------------------|
G|-----------------17-17-17-17-16--16--|
D|-------------------------------------|
A|-------------------------------------|
E|-------------------------------------|
e|-17--15--14--------------------------------------|
B|-------------17----------------------------------|
G|-----------------17-17-17-17-16--17-17-17-17-16--|
D|-------------------------------------------------|
A|-------------------------------------------------|
E|-------------------------------------------------|
But No
Because contradictions will arrive at every step and turn
Because complications will give rise to new sets of rules
Perhaps unaware he let slip what should not be known
Resource ever stretching will become his veneer disguise
Disguise when resumed could attempt to take his place
Replies when received would shock him to find himself
But no
B
[tabulated by cngrannell@yahoo.com]
[instrumental]
e|-------------|
B|-5-5----5----|
G|-------------|
D|-------------|
A|-------------|
E|-------------|
e|-------5---------|-------1---------|
B|-----5-----------|-----1-----------|
G|-----------------|-----------------|
D|---7-------7---5-|---3-------3---5-|
A|-----------------|-----------------|
E|-5-------5---3---|-1-------1---3---|
[top 2 strings are guitar, bottom 4 are bass here]
e|-----------------|
B|-0-1-0-1-0-1-0-1-|
G|-----------------|
D|-----------------|
A|-----------------|
E|-----------------|
e|----------------------|
B|-5----3---3\1---1/3---|
G|----------------------|
D|----------------------|
A|----------------------|
E|----------------------|
G|-------------------------|
D|---8-----8-----7-----7---|
A|-------------------------|
E|-8-----8-----7-----7-----|
The Classic Remains
Do Monday, Tuesday, Saturday
You've moved two days in my diary
Although the fault's been corrected
The crossings out still remain
They're left as a token, a reminder of something
Something leftover, not that I object
Just something leftover
Did it erase the scandal, that was devisive?
Just grasped out of nothing
Just out of thin air
Not that it matters
I measure the return?
I don't mean it, I just pretend
Always did
Not that it matters, my something leftover
Has got to remind me of a previous incarnation
Of previous remains
The disbelief
Alone on Piano
[tabulated by cngrannell@yahoo.com]
[instrumental]
[piano arr. 2 guitars]
e|--------------------|
B|--------------------|
G|--------------------|
D|--------------------|
A|-2----0-------------|
E|-----------3--------|
e|-0--------------|-0--------------|
B|-3---0-2-0-2-0--|-3---0-2-0-2-0--|
G|----------------|----------------|
D|----------------|----------------|
A|-2--------------|-0--------------|
E|----------------|----------------|
e|-0--------------|-0--------------|
B|-3---0-2-0-2-0--|-3---0-2-0-2-0--|
G|----------------|----------------|
D|----------------|----------------|
A|----------------|----------------|
E|-3--------------|----------------|
e|-7----5------5-7-5-----5-|-7----5------5-7-5------|
B|-----------8--------8----|-----------8--------8---|
G|-------------------------|------------------------|
D|-------------------------|------------------------|
A|-------------------------|------------------------|
E|-------------------------|------------------------|
e|-0--------------|-0--------------|----------------|
B|-3---0-2-0-2-0--|-3---0-2-0-2-0--|-3---0-2-0-2-0--|
G|----------------|----------------|----------------|
D|----------------|----------------|----------------|
A|----------------|----------------|-0--------------|
E|-2--------------|-3--------------|----------------|
e|-------14----|-------15----|-------17----|
B|-------14----|-------15----|-------17----|
G|-11----------|-12----------|-14----------|
D|-------------|-------------|-------------|
A|-------------|-------------|-------------|
E|-------------|-------------|-------------|
e|--------------------5--3--2--|
B|-0-2-3--2--3--2--3-----------|
G|-----------------------------|
D|-----------------------------|
A|-----------------------------|
E|-----------------------------|
e|---------------5-7-5-------|
B|-0-2-3---5---8-------8-----|
G|---------------------------|
D|---------------------------|
A|---------------------------|
E|---------------------------|
This Picture
No one
This picture pertaining to such entertainment
No thought of confinement, avoiding six figures
So don't respect strangers with no affectionate dressing
An act of caressing, don't just look at me
This picture containing each course, each stare
Each thought of escaping this picture oh dear
This picture performing to such adulation
No thought of belonging, avoiding six places
So don't mistake anger with no fixed emotion
An act of deploring shall catch me to die
This picture addressing each course, each why
Each thought of describing this picture oh dear
Not Me
It may be as you say, I'll admit
But you don't sound convinced
Between the surface you and the surface me
You didn't touch me
It may be as well that
I didn't see the point
You didn't touch me
I suppose it's just hollow
No idea, no spark
But I thought that in order to survive you need to touch me
All of the me's
Don't Bring Reminders
[tabulated by qwerty@cmu.edu]
[A# E]
Everything they say seems so insubstantial
A word of caution
Take care of what you got
It didn't come cheap
I mean look at the choices
A flip side of life
Don't bring reminders, let them all rock and roll
It's very insubstantial
I got you a first class booking
[E] Take the ticket, hit the wicket
[A F# G F#]
We've come to see what's left of you
What's left of you, what's left of you
We want to see what's left of you
What's left of you, what's left of you
You've been had
If you think that it had
Any relevance to you
Anyway (anyhow)